October 1998
October 1, 1998October 13, 1998
October 14, 1998
October 15, 1998
October 16, 1998
October 17, 1998
October 18, 1998
October 19, 1998
October 20, 1998
October 21, 1998
----MESSAGE-----
From: Carolyn L. NoyesOctober 23, 1998
Say what you will, but I am quite certain that running about nude while shooting an automatic weapon in a crowded grocery store IS a wrong way to eat a REESE'S Peanut Butter Cup.
October 24, 1998
hello
October 25, 1998
Yeah, my grandpa was like that, not mincin' words and all. He would tell it to you straight, just one word, maybe two, and be done with it. Some people tell me I'm just like him, about not mincin' words. They say I just say what I mean and don't say much except what I mean and that I get my point across with words to spare. I guess I take after my grandpa 'cause he didn't mince his words either. Some people say he and I are a lot alike.
October 26, 1998
hello
October 27, 1998
My son is nearing three and a half and I am most desireous that he begin to use the toilet. But try as we might, he still prefers his diaper, going into near hysteria when we take him near the toilet. The diaper bills are cutting into my LOTTO money! Yes, you could say that I regret telling him that the toilet is a vacumous gateway to hell!
October 28, 1998
A MESSAGE FROM THE FUTURE!
I bought a new kitten today. It was brown and orange with a cute little spot above it's nose. I named him "Mr. Flisker" just before I cleaned him. We cooked him up Western style and served him up over corn bread. It was delicious. If you'd like the recipe, just send me an e-mail.
October 29, 1998
No entry for today. No time. Gotta get more cashews.
October 30, 1998
I'm sure Shari Lewis was good-intentioned, but her "Song That Never Ends" has caused generations of childhood nightmares. I still suffer from them, walking in the middle of the night, cold sweat, eyes wide, gasping for breath, my mind wracked in sheer horror at those poor people who started singing the song, not knowing what it was only to become ensnared in it's eternal web, forced to continue singing that hellish song for all of time! HAVE YOU NO MERCY, SHARI?!?!? THEY DIDN'T KNOW THE POWER OF THE SONG!!!!
October 31, 1998
Tonight is Halloween, or "Helloween" as one of my past pastors insisted on calling it. He was also fond of calling HBO "Hell's Box Office" and the television the "Hellivision." I think someone's mouth needs to be washed out with soap.