A Smattering of Notes To and From Fuddboy #2

May 13, 1998


Thanks for the wishes! Correct Posture Month always reminds me of Jr. High square dancing lessons. Being a tall fellow, the two tall females in my class would prefer to dance with me, basically so they didn't have to slouch down to be with the 5'4" typical jr. high school guy. One was Tammy, an attractive, if trendy, friend. The other was Jodi, the epitome of female geek... with a back brace. Oh yes, I remember all too well the crook of my arm being pressed against that plastic back brace whilst I promanaded around the circle with Jodi. Of course, when it was ladies choice, I would try to hide until I could find Tami, unless she had a hinkering for some fellow, if which case I was doomed. Some nights, I jolt awake and swear I can hear, faintly, as if being played softly on a small transistor radio around the corner, "Everybody circle left in the grand right and left!".

Bow to your corner,

Red River

May 26, 1998


Before the whole family comes down this Friday to stay for a weekend in your Disguise-a-Hammock, I thought I should bring you up to speed on a couple of things since it has been a while since our clans have clashed. Laura has pierced every body part in sight and is working on having the Bible tattooed on her body. She wishes to be called "Perfidy". In addition to Joshua, we have another little boy whom we named Johannes Chrysostomus Wolfgangus Amedeus Hoffman, but we call him Rog Jr., though I have no idea why. Joshua went and joined a country western band, so we disowned him. I have no idea of his current whereabout.

When you least expect it,


May 28, 1998


Dreamt last night that I was visiting you at Indy and showed up at your work an hour or two early. You were busy so I decided to wait and went into the restroom. As I had all my stuff to stay overnight, I decided to shave the bottoms of my feet, thinking, "Yeah, Roger will get a real kick out of this!"

Strange happenings,


May 28, 1998

From Uncle Smeggy
Subject: Blue's Clues


Response from Fuddboy

Porpoise Lips:

It's pectin? Suspecting? Expecting?

Do you suspect that you are expecting pectin? Because I know nothing about no pectin. Or....are you just expecting...as in a baby? You've hinted around about it a little.

Your Favorite Proctologist,

Jay Lefinger

Closing Remarks from Uncle Smeggy:
Subject: Blue's Clues

Um... I gotta go to lunch...